at the end of the day, i stop and think, of the warmth, care, comfort, support, and love that envelopes me. the house is quiet, and i look and see the evidence of a family that lives here that fills my life with such joy. of course our family is at a time of trying to make sense of it seems so many things, and yet there is love, love that is rooted so deeply. it is such a comforting feeling to know that with Christ there is nothing that we cannot get through. i must admit though that there have been things revealed within the last several months that i never dreamed we'd ever have to deal with as a family. you think not our family, or this can't possibly be happening, or that it can't be true that these things took place. if you allow yourself to think too deeply it can just about burn a hole in your heart, eat it up and fill you with such anger, and yet deep inside you realize that in doing so, it would be the exact action you should not take, it's a road you know you must not take. i've been tempted and i have had to fight such emotions. do i still have to keep myself from becoming so overwhelmed with anger that i could just about spit fire? yes, you better believe i have. I've looked at the circumstances, ran over it with a fine tooth comb, dissected it over, and over again, thought of it sometimes too deep, way too deeply, because in doing so, anger has risen up inside of me to the point of exploding and pouring all of it's ugly contents all over the inside of my entire being. i can just imagine it running down and coming in contact with all that indwells within me. But, there's a Spirit that lives within me that says Kim, this is not what you want to do, you want (NO MATTER HOW HARD IT IS) to give it over to me, each and every time. i have come so close to hating, i have become so close to detesting, the violation, the victimisation, and have felt many times that i would be justified in doing so. but, am i really? no. because who am i? how can i judge? i am merely a sinner myself saved and covered by the the grace of God. if not for His grace, i could easily fall into the deepest pit of sin. each day i sin, so, who am i to become so haughty and view myself as better? i am nothing but, by the blood that Jesus Christ so freely shed for me. if i want to be a piece of clay that can be molded and made into His image, i must be soft and pliable, flexible, and willing to be molded. God is not finished with me yet. the thought of becoming hard, and brittle, is a thought that i don't wish to entertain. to be put on a shelf because i can no longer be used in the masters hand is a place that i don't even want my mind to go to. yes, wounds can be fresh, but the only one that can take care of them is the healing hand of Jesus. not me, not anyone around me, only the tender and gentle hand of my blessed and precious Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.
Rescue
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